Once again conservative circles at court found a welcome scapegoat in the English physicians, who had not wanted to operate on the fatally ill emperor. Vicky's relationship to her son had been difficult from the very beginning. It was not only that she saw his handicap as a blemish; she had to recognise that he was not growing up a second Prince Albert. Despite his courageous attempts to overcome his physical handicap, she never gave him a word of encouragement, but rather insisted on an exceedingly strict, almost brutal education that was not suitable for him. Even Queen Victoria felt that Vicky was too severe toward William. William longed for the love and recognition of his mother, but he felt that he would never have his desire fulfilled. In the same way, he felt attracted to his English relatives and to England, although he also tried to free himself of them. He was taught to speak English, to consider England, which he visited almost every year up until 1914, as his second home and to accept the lifestyle of the English gentry as the highest ideal of society.